House Tea Party

Since we made up our House Rules I can’t say everything has been peaches and cream, but I can say that overall it’s better than rotten apples or a harbor full of Earl Grey.
We had a family meeting last week to review the rules and discuss how well they’ve been followed.  We decided the existing rules were still fair and sufficient for our purposes and all-in-all we followed them ok, with some room for improvement.  I think that by continuing to visit the topic the boys we are understanding that we mean business and by including the boys in the process we are gaining their commitment.  We then advanced to the discussion about disciplinary action when the rules are broken.  Everyone gets one clear warning like:

Please help clean up the table before dinner.
Awwwwwe, come on!
Uh, rule #1 is be respectful at all times.
Yes, mother dearest.

See how smoothly that will go?!  If by damn sure an incredibly rare quirk of fate the perp still doesn’t comply they are given a choice of 10 pushups or situps.  Further non-compliance will involve the immediate loss of all electronic media for a day.  Beyond that a special parental disciplinary hearing is required.  Believe me, we’ll all laugh together when we look back at this some day – in triplicate.
I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised as this topic falls under some of the oldest guidelines in our country – no taxation without representation.  A concept today that remains just as fair and is followed ok, with some room for improvement.  Same concept, same results.  Our forefathers would be proud that we remembered this lesson.
Given that we were having moderate success with our initial doctrine we brought up the subject of getting ready for school in the morning.  Henceforth to be known as the kicking-and-screaming-to-get-out-the-door proclamation.  Bird started going grey at 18 and she doesn’t need the help of asking the boys over and over again to put on their socks while they let their cereal get soggy in front of the TV.  So we created a new list – a morning routine that must be followed by each person before the TV or some game gets turned on.

Use the bathroom
Eat breakfast
Get dressed
Brush teeth and comb hair
Backpack and lunch ready
---- Minimum before TV can be turned on ----
Mom decides when it is time to go

Here’s the kicker.  This all has to be done while still adhering to the original four rules.  So getting dressed really means getting dressed and not leaving the old clothes lay around in the bedroom or bathroom lest you violate rule #3.  We parents are simply wicked with expectations.  The power is going straight to our heads!
I think it’s had about 1.5 weeks to sink in, and Bird texted me at work this morning with, “We have the best kids!”  So I called her back and said, “Of course we do!  What’s your point?”  She explained to me that she awoke to the subtle sounds of the boys arguing a bit.  She got up expecting to find the boys half-naked and fighting; the sure signs of a really pleasant and cooperative morning.  What she found was Justin getting into the shower and Sam already dressed.  A bit later when Bird got out of the shower she found both boys making their own school lunches; sandwiches, carrots, and pudding!  They even took their little ice packs out of the freezer to apply to Bird’s bruised head after she passed out and hit the floor.  I’m glad they’re skilled in first aid.
I suggested that she leave with them early for school and stop by Caribou for a treat as a reward for their behavior.  Consider it a stimulus package if you like or a parole if it pleases you.  It kind of depends on whether you see the glass as half-full or half-empty – of tea.