Shooting Craps

We've all gambled and lost at least once in our lives, but I was fortunate to have recently witnessed someone's mistake 1st hand which I simply can't contain any longer - and funny that, neither could he...

A friend at work just turned a ripe 30 years old.  In celebration most of the team plus a couple friends got together at our favorite local bar for a night out.  The bar food was not stellar this evening and was working its magic on me quickly.  Very early in the evening I found myself needing to make a trip to the bathroom.  It was a rather busy night and I was waiting a short time for one of the stalls to open.

As a stall door finally opened I eagerly made my way in just behind the exiting occupant but had to stop short.  Before me was a scene that I had only ever heard stories about before in my life.  It took me a moment to take it all in.  The first thing I noticed was how wet the entire area was.  The walls halfway up the stall and a foot around the toilet bowl were soaking wet as was the seat of the toilet itself.  And smudged upon the very back of the toilet seat was a hefty helping of poop!  By now I was aghast with shock!  What could he have possible been doing in here to cause this mess?  The answer wasn't far away.

The edge of some item was sticking out from just behind the toilet base.  Still standing just at the stall opening I leaned over to peek around the toilet only to realize that he had left behind a pair of not-so-tidy tighty whities.  And then it dawned upon me...he didn't make it through The Move in time!  This poor guy had dropped trou before he could manage to drop his actual trousers and this devastation was the result of his attempt to clean himself up.

My empathy for him quickly disappeared, however, as I turned to see him leaving the bathroom without so much as even washing his hands!  Ewwwww!  And just when you think it couldn't be worse let me tell you this disgusting individual did NOT leave the bar.  We continued to see him enjoying himself with others throughout the evening.  I felt an urge to announce to the bar what this guy had done (or not done) and to have him shunned, and though each drink brought me a little closer I never quite mustered the gumption to roll those dice.  After all, I may have crapped out myself...