I like to believe I have a stretch limo complete with a bike rack and seating for 50. And I only have to tip my chaffeur $3 each time I'm driven somewhere. He's cheap.
Since my last bus story I've had many a pleasant trip. I'm usually one of the first on and one of the last off so I set some stock in knowing I don't have to worry about any particular stop for a long while. In go the earbuds and on goes some NPR Podcast to pass the time.
Just the other day the bus was filling up as I was sitting next to a window with my eyes shut and my head in La La Land deep meaningful thoughts. A lady came to sit next to me and Wham! she laid a hip check into me worthy of the Hanson Brothers. I was shocked! And it didn’t stop there. She continued to bump and grind into me as she nestled into her seat over the next 30 seconds. I’ve never been much of a dancer but this lady was clearly trying to get me to do the Butt.
As I glared at her I realized her serene face and pleasant, rosy disposition made her look like Mrs. Claus. There was no quality of maleficence in her demeanor. She obviously grew up in some Hedonistic very close social system where this type of activity is completely normal. Mr. Claus is a lucky dude. This stark contrast to her mosh pit style behavior really stanched my rising frustration and prevented me from being rude to her out loud thank goodness.
I guess upon reflection she may have given me something to think about. Honey? Got any red tights? I’ll rent a sleigh and we can see what Santa brings in the sack…
1 comment:
See, riding the bus is good for ALL aspects of your life. A little hipcheck spawned a little *spice* for Mr. Claus.
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